Daughter just passed test - help!

[janicearcher]

Hi everyone

My 17 year old daughter has just passed her test (1st time, 2 minors); she had 30 driving lessons and an additional approx 30+ hours of supervised driving with either myself or my husband.

It sank in how unprepared for the reality of the world of driving is on her first evening out in the car post test when we drove into a car park. I asked her to park up, and she hadnt much of an idea of how to do this.

It seems the ADI's car was marked with little markers on parts of the interior window + a magnifying mirror to help guide reversing, and parallel parking - without these on our car she was absolutely at a loss.

After an extensive period of "instruction" on parking/reverse parking given by my husband this weekend she still coudlnt grasp it! The problem seems to be that while he can show her what to do, and attempt to explain it he's obviously not getting it across to her in a way she can understand.

This experience, added to her lack of experience and confidence in being out on her own has thrown her (and us) quite a bit. Can anyone help with advice on how to convey in words of one syllable - or by a diagram - how to master parking?

Two worried parents would be exceptionally grateful .

JTP

[ROG]

Get 'Mind driving' by Stephen Haley ASAP.

As for parking etc - find an off road or very quiet area such as an IND EST on a Sunday and take some cones or similar and let her loose to play - no tuition - let her find out.

Empty Tesco or similar car parks are good for bay parking practice - again, leave her alone - no tuition.

Empty wheelie bins make a good obstacle to park between

[martine]

I know exactly how you feel: my own 19 year old daugter passed last year.

Pass Plus is the obvious follow on then followed perhaps a year later by IAM or ROSPA.

If you don't know about Pass Plus it's 6 hours extra instruction with an ADI covering country roads, night driving, dual-carriageway, motorway, poor weather, town driving. There is no test but you do get a certificate at the end and it can reduce your insurance. It has to be taken within 12 months of passing the L-test.

My daughter is actually quite good at town driving but has yet to go on a motorway or try a multi-storey car park (!) and is just getting to the dangerous 'over-confident' stage. What doesn't help is she's now at Uni and so only drives during hols with large gaps.

Parking is a problem but it's not dangerous - what worries me most is some idiot doing something stupid and causing my daughter to crash. Experienced drivers have developed anticipation to minimise the risks - new drivers need to gain that in a controlled and guided way.

New drivers that actually enjoy driving will probably want to take futher instruction. My own daughter likes the freedom a car brings but is far from being an enthusiast and I don't think she will do IAM/ROSPA...unfortunately

[daz6215]

I would agree with Rog , let her take responsibility and she will learn quicker herself, practice makes perfect!
ADI
Rospa Gold
LGV 1

[waremark]

This should help her to understand that though she is now allowed to practise on her own she has not finished learning to drive. After my children passed, we had a programme of short local journeys they already knew on their own, then taking one or two passengers, then a longer journey including m'way with me, then some night, etc. I also recommend Pass Plus and of course advanced in due course. You don't say whether you have already taken an advanced test. If not, you might do it at the same time!

Personally, I don't quite agree with no tuition for the parking. I would first give a demo, pointing out where to start from, and where to be looking for each type of manoeuver. I do agree that at some point you have to let her get on and practise.

[Renny]

Lots of practice in an otherwise empty car park. Always encourage her to reverse park wherever possible as it is safer and easier on the car and driver.

It is really poor that the ADI used so many "tricks" to make it easy and never showed her how to park unaided. I never had anything on my car when I was an ADI, other than using the mirrors. Although I do admit to having a mark on the trailer wing for the HGV

[michael769]

I would second the Pass Plus suggestion. I suspect thet you will shortly find that your daughter is also unprepared for motorway and nighttime driving. Both of which will be covered.

I would advise getting an ADI who is happy to let her use her own car for the tuition. getting familiar with one car in the first few months after passing the test will do wonders for her confidence.

I'd also suggest get ter her into IAM/RoSPA once she gains confidence (6-12 months). That will help to nip any bad habits in the bud, and consolidate any good ones.

[Gareth]

Empty car-park and a series of cones, well-spaced and in a straight line. Get her to do a reverse slalom ... repeatedly, until she is accomplished at this exercise.

I think the late Alan Clark opined that new drivers should learn to drive backwards before they are allowed to drive forwards!

[PeteG]

And it's said that some ADIs teach only to pass the test... I was lucky that my ADI taught me to park using simply mirrors, windows, and judgement. If I'm driving an unfamiliar car for any length of time (or when I've got another *cough*), I'll convoy over to the local indstrial estate and get a feel for the size, turning circle, etc, and practice parking around another car.

[TripleS]

Hiya Jan,

Many congratulations to your daughter; that's really nice, and I hope she'll enjoy her driving career. I'll leave the others to advise on parking, because that's something I still have a bit of trouble with at times.

Can't remember what it was about just now, but a while back I said something that was intended to assist Martin's daughter, but he warned me off PDQ, so I need to be a bit careful!

Doesn't anybody around here trust me to get anything right?

<slinks off feeling lonely and rejected>

Best wishes all,
Dave.

[janicearcher]

Thanks to everyone here for the advice and words of encouragement - much appreciated.

Pass plus is definitely the next step forward, followed by IAM 6 - 12 months later; all agreed (if somewhat reluctantly) with the young lady!

In the meantime, off to a car park with cones to try out reversing etc. Hope this doesnt sound too silly but where will I be able to purchase the cones?

last but not least, I should just add that being a "supervisor" during my daughter's learning period motivated me to enrol in IAM, so I'm rather nervously waiting for my test to come through.

Cheers folks,
Jtp

[Mr Cholmondeley-Warner]

First of all congratulations to your daughter

I know this won't probably chime with the rest of opinion on here, being an advanced driving forum and all that, but I would pursue a slightly different tack.

Learning to drive is a stressful time, a bit like exams. Once it's over, it's nice to be able to relax for a while, rather than starting out on a new regime of learning straight away. I would say maybe have 3 or 6 months away from driving instructors, just driving (and most of that time WITHOUT a nervous Mum or Dad in the passenger seat), and THEN maybe embark on the new schemes.

If different conditions crop up during that time - e.g. night driving, fast trunk roads etc. then maybe take an experienced passenger along the first time, or the first couple of times, but also it's important for confidence for her to feel that she's not being mollycoddled or monitored ALL the time. Work up gradually to the more difficult tasks, and it'll be less stressful, imho.

It'd be interesting to hear from the lady herself.

[Gareth]

Hope this doesnt sound too silly but where will I be able to purchase the cones?

I've found they're fairly easy to borrow, and as long as they're put back, they're hardly ever missed! Of course it depends from where you borrow them! An alternative is to use anything that stands tall enough to be see from a car window. Even people are a possibility, and it tends to concentrate the mind of the driver wonderfully!

[ROG]

janicearcher wrote:

Hope this doesnt sound too silly but where will I be able to purchase the cones?

Local police station or council may lend you some if you explain the purpose

[ScoobyChris]

If you're still after buying some, they can be had from ebay.... and probably sold on to the local horsey centre when you've finished...

Ebay Link

Chris