ADUK Archive

WhoseGeneration wrote:Too much analysis, that way lies madness.
With never an answer.

Just some food for thought about getting wound up.

Could you also take your statement I've just quoted, and then turn it on yourself and the importance you attach to the Mercedes incident you described?

trashbat wrote:

WhoseGeneration wrote:Too much analysis, that way lies madness.
With never an answer.

Just some food for thought about getting wound up.

Could you also take your statement I've just quoted, and then turn it on yourself and the importance you attach to the Mercedes incident you described?

Trashbat, stop the attempt at analysis.
I'm one who thoroughly understands my motivations and who can totally control my emotional responses.
There's an opening for you though, if you can deconstruct.

MGF wrote:

vonhosen wrote:Ticket for what?
Fog lights?
Is that what everybody wants?

Inconsiderate driving appears to be the charge. Fear of being caught and sanctioned might help.

What was inconsiderate?
Overtaking before the lane becoming one lane?
Fog lights?
Or if somebody let's you go first is it inconsiderate driving?

Surely somebody had to concede to the other. It's when neither concedes or both concedes you have more of a problem.

WhoseGeneration wrote:

trashbat wrote:

WhoseGeneration wrote:That'd be me then today, 30 mph limit, two lanes approaching one because the left one becomes a bus lane, "Ok, Mr. Mercedes driver with foglights on with no need, I'll ease off to let you get ahead".
So, do I reinforce that driver's attitude to "making progress"?
See the problem?
It's a nonsense if those who are thinking have to increasingly bow to and accommodate those who just do what they want.

I know what your point is, and I sympathise. However, apart from that which has already been said:

Q: What may happen to you if you do not accommodate him? Is it worth it?

Q: Having taken some other course of action, would you be happy describing and justifying it to other people, e.g. on here?

Q: What will likely happen to him - without your input - based on his behaviour?

Q: What is your role and/or duty in changing his behaviour? What about others?

Q: Is there a legitimate or at least understandable explanation for his behaviour?

Q: Will you remember and be annoyed by this incident in several days?

Q: At the end of your journey, what will be the difference both in progress and feelings (e.g. stress) between having let him in or not?

Too much analysis, that way lies madness.
With never an answer.

Of course navel gazing can lead to paralysis, but we are some way from there with a bit of post incident reflection.

WhoseGeneration wrote:

trashbat wrote:

WhoseGeneration wrote:Too much analysis, that way lies madness.
With never an answer.

Just some food for thought about getting wound up.

Could you also take your statement I've just quoted, and then turn it on yourself and the importance you attach to the Mercedes incident you described?

I'm one who thoroughly understands my motivations and who can totally control my emotional responses.
There's an opening for you though, if you can deconstruct.

You don't appear to be happy about it though.
Is that something you'd like to change?

vonhosen wrote:What was inconsiderate?

You're asking the wrong person. For the purpose of the thread-subject it is probably better to take WG's word for it than analyse the standard of driving. Personally I don't generally get annoyed at having to ease off around a merge point but I wasn't there.

WhoseGeneration wrote:

trashbat wrote:

WhoseGeneration wrote:Too much analysis, that way lies madness.
With never an answer.

Just some food for thought about getting wound up.

Could you also take your statement I've just quoted, and then turn it on yourself and the importance you attach to the Mercedes incident you described?

Trashbat, stop the attempt at analysis.
I'm one who thoroughly understands my motivations and who can totally control my emotional responses.
There's an opening for you though, if you can deconstruct.

TB, didn't you see that response coming? Questioning like this can be just as antagonising to the subject as expecting him to master avoiding BGOL. Maybe more so because at least with the latter the subject understands it is what is expected from the examiner.

MGF wrote:TB, didn't you see that response coming? Questioning like this is can be just as antagonising to the subject as expecting him to master avoiding BGOL. Maybe more so because at least with the latter the subject understands it is what is expected from the examiner.

Meh - yes, it's to be expected, although perhaps more easily in written comms than in real life, and perhaps less easily in a context where one is a willing pupil.

However it's not really my interest in chasing it headlong into an adversarial game of chess where I have to guess the right angle; that goes beyond what I'm willing to engage in. You can resist any psychological engagement if you're so inclined - even self-referred CBT patients 'fail' because they don't want to change.

In our context, that ability to engage is movable based on the pupil and the quality of the teacher, but I certainly don't have many of the answers, nor claim to.

Interesting demonstration though.

Edit : I do, and more did, get annoyed at others' shonky driving, especially when it fits the pattern of being considered rather than just plain incompetent, and also when it enables them to reinforce their poor behaviour as WG describes. However all this stuff works for me - at least to an extent.

We, not being Traffic Officers, can't really make a positive change in others.

The sensible thing to do is to accommodate them and work round what they are doing. It might occasionally cost us a bit of progress, but so what? In the vast majority of cases the price is worth paying, IMHO.

For the most part I'm happy to accommodate what others are doing. I'll make my progress elsewhere, if I feel like it.

vonhosen wrote:

MGF wrote:What should Government be doing about this? (Apart from get rid of bus lanes of course).

vonhosen wrote:...How are you going to find out without asking the other driver?

Maybe that's the answer. More unmarked cars and more tickets.

Ticket for what?
Fog lights?
Is that what everybody wants?

Yep, well bans, more like. It'd slim down the driving population quite usefully.

Shall I produce my list of things for which road users should receive an immediate ban? It could be quite a long list.

TripleS wrote:We, not being Traffic Officers, can't really make a positive change in others.

The sensible thing to do is to accommodate them and work round what they doing. It might occasionally cost us a bit of progress, but so what? In the vast majority of cases the price is worth paying, IMHO.

For the most part I'm happy to accommodate.what others are doing. I'll make my progress elsewhere, if I feel like it.

Is this a first? SSS describes my feelings rather well.

waremark wrote:Is this a first? SSS describes my feelings rather well.

It may depend on whether or not you are still driving

Shall I produce my list of things for which road users should receive an immediate ban? It could be quite a long list.

WhoseGeneration wrote:The other exceeded the 30 mph limit and executed an overtake as the lanes became one.
Then, what do I care?, I'm old, I'm still alive, I must be doing something right.
I am one who does facilitate merging and allowing others to enter traffic when circumstances allow.
I'll admit and here we, again, enter the stuff this thread has come to discuss, to, sometimes, having a human response.

Here you go WG, the Driver's Serenity Prayer:

Von, grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change,
courage to change the things we can,
and wisdom to know the difference.

waremark wrote:

TripleS wrote:We, not being Traffic Officers, can't really make a positive change in others.

The sensible thing to do is to accommodate them and work round what they doing. It might occasionally cost us a bit of progress, but so what? In the vast majority of cases the price is worth paying, IMHO.

For the most part I'm happy to accommodate.what others are doing. I'll make my progress elsewhere, if I feel like it.

Is this a first? SSS describes my feelings rather well.

Oh, I didn't think it was a first. By my reckoning there's a fair degree of compatibility in our general approach, but maybe I presume too much.

In any case, I can't imagine you going off in a huff because of what I say, Mark.

TripleS wrote:In any case, I can't imagine you going off in a huff because of what I say, Mark.

Never in a huff, and this post of yours was spot on, but in general I am quite supportive of the traditional IAM/RoSPA approach, whereas while I know you accept that what they do has some value, you are not.